Fickle Foodie September 9, 2010

The blonde has been getting increasingly picky with her food over the past few months and at some points during the summer holidays, I did wonder whether I should just go back to a purely liquid diet, as it’s the only source of nutrition she actually takes any pleasure from. Well, that and fromage frais.

Time after time I’d prepare a perfectly balanced meal that her brother and sister would quietly scoff, whilst the blonde merely looked on with disdain, wondering why her siblings couldn’t see that they were being duped into eating rubbish.

The most frustrating thing, was the fact that her pickiness wasn’t even reliable. Day 1, bolognaise would be devoured. Day 2, it would be hurled across the room. The same was true of fruit. Bananas weren’t even considered for consumption for the first weeks of our trip, but then a chance encounter (when she was starving, having rejected the shepherd’s pie), meant they were very much back on the Blonde-proof menu. Well, I think we managed a fortnight before they were back on the reject pile.

We tried every trick in the book to try to convince her, but once she’s made up her mind she’s not going to eat something, that’s pretty much game over. No amount of face pulling, aeroplane noises and actions with the spoon, or the promise of a lifetime supply of Petits Filous if she’ll only try the fish pie; makes any difference. Stubborn, doesn’t begin to describe it.

My father resorted to hiding vegetables in her yoghurt pot in the hope of silently secreting them into her mouth without her realising. He did relatively well with peas one lunchtime; broccoli however, was swiftly sussed and thrown back at him with more than a hint of disgust for someone she’d previously considered an ally.

Towards the end of the holiday we cracked a new solution which we still rely on today. Whenever a plate of food is presented to either twin, they immediately both check out their sibling’s plate, just to be sure they’re not being short-changed. For reasons only they can understand, the other twin’s plate is always far more enticing, despite the fact that they’re always given exactly the same portions.

We discovered that whilst the blonde would reject her own food, if you offered her a spoon from her sister’s bowl, she would often happily oblige with an open mouth. This works really well until the brunette realises what’s going on and complains (and fair enough), that her meal has suddenly halved. So, welcome to the ridiculous scenario where the blonde eats the brunette’s food, off the brunette’s plate, with the brunette’s spoon, whilst the brunette eats the blonde’s rejected meal.

And the most bizarre thing? We carry out this ridiculous ritual as if it’s the most normal scenario on earth! I’m beginning to think that it’s not them that’s daft, it’s us!

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Brunch April 3, 2010

Brunch is something of an expat tradition. In our 4+ years in Singapore we ‘brunched’ a lot but we’ve yet to really get into the swing of brunch in Dubai. This may or may not have something to do with the fact that we now have 1-year-old twins.

This weekend however, we took the plunge. Some really good friends asked if we’d like to join them at ‘Bubbalicious’, one of the newest brunches in town. It’s the Easter weekend, school has finished for two weeks and hey, we felt like a day out.

You see that’s the thing with brunch – it really does consume the whole day. It usually starts around 1230pm and carries on until at least 4pm and by that time, you’re either too drunk, too full, or a combination of both, to care about anything else happening that day.

As we have 3 children, the hours before 1230 were spent packing bags to see us through the rest of the day. By the time I’d worked out how many changes of clothes, drinks, nappies, toys and emergency first aid kits may be required, it was time to call a taxi.

I have to say I was a little nervous at the prospect of taking all 3 children to brunch. I was less worried about my son as our friends have a daughter of a similar age so I knew he’d have a like-minded accomplice to help him trawl the dessert counter way before I’d have chance to make sure he’d had a suitable intake of vegetables.

The twins however are a little more unpredictable. By giving them a late breakfast and a lengthy session in the Exer-Saucer they were shattered and back in bed by 930am. The fact that they were still asleep at nearly 12 was a bonus. We scooped them up and popped them and the equivalent of 3 overnight bags in the cab.

I needn’t have worried. ‘Bubbalicious’ has all the elements to make sure every age group is catered for. They have an entire room of children’s food and entertainment so the girls feasted on macaroni cheese, carrot sticks and cucumber before moving on to the cakes and pastries which were definitely more popular. They even enjoyed fortune cookies though the ‘choose not a bad accomplice tomorrow’ motto was perhaps lost on them.

But it was not the food that was the star attraction. This particular brunch included a petting zoo and Chinese acrobats. Yes, really. We barely saw our son for 4 hours as he occasionally popped back to our table to tell us he was heading to the bouncy castle.

The girls were intrigued by the parrots, puppies, tortoises and snakes. And as ever with twins, there was a steady stream of willing cuddlers desperate to wander around the restaurant with them.

And Mummy? The free-flow champagne definitely ensured a great start to the Easter weekend and I’d have to say, we’ll be doing brunch again.

New Tricks April 1, 2010

I’m starting to think that my girls are really rather cunning. If fact, I’m starting to think that I have many years of trouble ahead if this is how conniving they are at 13 months, imagine what they’ll be like at 13 years.

Twin 1 has decided that she no longer likes fruit. Any fruit. Only a week ago she would happily tuck into pineapple, banana, melon, strawberries and grapes. Actually, she used to suck the flesh of the grapes and then spit the skins out like a monkey but at least some of it made it into her tummy. Twin 2 has always liked fruit and doesn’t much care what type it is. She’ll eat anything.

Twin 1 has cottoned on to this fact and today demonstrated her cunning. I passed her a piece of fruit, then turned my attention back to the bowl to pass a piece to her sister. In this split second, she handed her fruit over to her twin who of course willingly grabbed it and stuffed it in her mouth. Cue much giggling from twin 1 and twin 2 as they had both got precisely what they wanted from the deal.

I’m starting to feel a little outnumbered.

Food Glorious Food March 16, 2010

The twins are now at the stage where in theory at least, they can eat pretty much anything. I think foie gras, oysters and sushi are still some way off but in general, I can now whip up a meal for them from the staple ingredients found in our fridge.

We have passed the stage where everything has to be pulped until it resembles wallpaper paste (albeit rainbow coloured wallpaper paste). Now we are at the ridiculously messy point where all meals must be handled, squashed, squeezed and rolled across the high chair tray before they can be consumed. 

Twin 2 is definitely the more adventurous when it comes to eating. She will actually try something to decide whether or not she likes it. Twin 1 however goes through a series of  tests that would put the Volkswagen engineers to shame. These results alone can determine whether it’s worth taking the next step and moving the food into her mouth.

She is very particular about texture and elasticity. Each bite-sized chunk is rigorously examined and if it doesn’t conform to her high standards, it is simply dropped over the edge of the high chair. Rejected.

Once something makes it into her mouth, it is way too much to ask for it to stay there. She sucks, she chews and then her fingers creep up to retrieve the saliva-coated mush so that she can take another good look at it. Surprisingly, it almost always goes back in her mouth. If we’re really lucky, she may even swallow it.

It’s fair to say that right now, we’re not really very polite company at a dinner table. With one baby, you can almost get away with it by sandwiching the highchair between two parents. With both adults on the look out for mobile foodstuffs, many disasters are averted.

With two high chairs, there is nothing discreet about the presence of twins at any table. But we can’t avoid eating out forever. Today one of my dearest friends invited us to join her family for brunch at a smart hotel in the Marina. We happily accepted, mainly because the brunch in question involves free-flowing champagne.

I have a sneaking suspicion that this brunch may just call for a further mention in my blog.

Easter weekend in case you’re wondering…