It’s becoming a real possibility that this blog may morph into a tenant-related saga given the developments of this week. The twins and the big brother have been a delight and we’ve enjoyed a fabulous week together, making the most of the British summer. There’s little to report on the family front other than a breakdown of our travels and excursions.
We started the week in Devon with the big brother’s best mate H. It doesn’t matter how long since they last saw each other (in this case, almost a year), but they always fall back into their old games and favourite pastimes within a matter of minutes. It’s lovely to see.
From Devon we did a brief pit-stop at my parents house where a trip to Berkeley castle and the butterfly farm proved a great hit with all three small people. Then from Gloucestershire, we headed up to North Yorkshire to see my oldest pal E and indulge in even more child-friendly excursions. Picnics and playgrounds being the necessity that keep the troops entertained and more importantly, worn out!
Whilst the children are content seeing old friends and enjoying the novelty of outdoor activity and pleasantly warm sunshine; the fly in the ointment has been the persistent and seemingly unending list of complaints from Mrs Bossy Knickers aka my new tenant.
The week started with an email of epic proportions. A full 18 points of complaint that needed ‘immediate resolution’. I was tempted to simply copy and paste her written rant so you could appreciate that I’m not exaggerating her unreasonable demands; but felt this perhaps may not make for the most enjoyable of posts.
Instead, a selection of my favourite complaints this week:
1) There are visible cracks between the floorboards.
It’s a Victorian property, and the floors are original. After 150+ years, I’ve a feeling Mrs BK herself may also be showing a few visible cracks!
2) Mrs BK can’t get her television to work. Please can the agent drive over to the property to fix this for her.
The agent did drive the 12 miles to the house (which is more than I would have done), plugged the TV into the wall, turned it on, and surprise, surprise… the TV works.
3) Please can the agent urgently visit the property to explain to Mrs BK ‘the rules regarding garbage disposal in this county’!
I was tempted to email her to explain that we don’t have ‘garbage’ in the Cotswolds, but admittedly this may have been seen as facetious.
Instead, the agent emailed some valuable information to her. When you have items to dispose of, you place them in a bin, and at the end of every week, some nice men from the council come and remove them. Fabulous! Is this phenomenon unique to Gloucestershire I wonder?
4) Please can the agent come to the house to empty the bin that is ‘full of nappies’.
Now this one really did grate. Whilst at my house, in the days before Mrs BK moved in, I needed to change both my girls. Wet nappies, nothing offensive, that I placed in my bin. It’s a large wheely bin that, when I left the property, contained only the 2 used nappies I had disposed of.
So one of two things must have occurred. 1) a nappy-wielding beast deposited a hundred or so nappies in the bin in the time between me leaving and Mrs BK arriving (around 36 hours). Or 2) Mrs BK is not only extremely demanding, but also desperately short-sighted and/or prone to hallucinations that make 2 nappies seem as if they are filling a standard wheelie bin (240 litre capacity!).
To my amusement, our agent also took issue with this complaint, and whilst at the house turning on the TV, took a photo of the inside of the bin (still containing just the 2 nappies) and emailed it to both myself and Mrs BK to enquire if this was indeed, the bin in question.
I reckon for that alone, she’s earned her commission this month.